mi primer amor

One of the things that made me happy today was a conversation with a good friend of mine. We don't often talk but when we do, it really gives me the kind of feeling that people write novels about. A caveat, though - that feeling is nowhere near love as our friendship is purely platonic. Things used to be awkward between us, but I gave our friendship a chance and I'm glad I made that decision. For some reason, when the two of us hang out, our talk often leads to love-related topics. I won't dwell on those things since those are private, but today, he said some things that really hit me - hence the blog post.

What I said: I really really want to go to college already. My life is a stone's throw away from the peak of entropy level (if such a thing exists) and I feel that college will enable me to start with a clean slate.

What he said: Same goes for me. I want to go to college already. But unlike you, I want to end things with a clean slate because only then can I begin again. Do you think you can simply run away? The past will haunt you forever unless you take measures to resolve the conflicts bothering you. If you don't get my point, consider a buffet meal. Can you fully enjoy the main course if bits and pieces of the appetizer are still on your plate?
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What I said: Hey, who's your first love?

What he said: None yet.

What I said: Really? Well, this is something I always ask my close friends. Who deserves the title "My First Love" in your life? Is it the person you first had a crush on, the first one you had a mutual understanding with, your first boyfriend, or what?

What he said: It depends. How do you define love? For starters, dictionary definition states you love a person when you're willing to sacrifice for him/her even if you don't get something in return.

What I said: In the first place, that's not a dictionary definition. My trusty dictionary says it's having an intense passion or great liking for someone.

What he said: But that could be lust, you know.

And then we blabbered and all after that. Anyway, that was seemingly a no-brainer, don't you think? Yet that only occurred to me for the first time today. I guess my perception has been distorted by movies or shows or whatever. I've been wondering what's first love when a more basic question should have been answered instead.

With how I define romantic love, it seems like I am yet to meet my first love.