Nine Months

Nine months ago, I started a  blog inside the four corners of my room, for want of a virtual breathing space where I can voice my thoughts and frustrations. I was so hormonal back then, really, that if you look through the archive of my previous blog, you'll probably roll your eyes and go squeamish.

But just as a woman undergoes internal metamorphosis (in the sense that the baby grows so fast) during pregnancy, my previous blog had also probably carried me along those nine months to allow changes inside and outside me to take form.

That fortuitous day on September, all the divine forces have probably conspired to help me take on a new endeavor that would turn out, later on, to be an important milestone in my life. A mixture of a random thought, and a desire to explain the rationale behind my sentiments. Voila, my blog was born.

So much has changed since then. I now find myself in the hustle of bustle of Manila, a dangerous and busy world that seldom gives an opportunity for rest and reflection. My only real solace there is the realm of sleep and dreams, but even that is quickly cut out by the buzzing of my pesky alarm clock after a few hours or so.

After five (indescribably long) days, I'm happy to say that I'm alone and really comfortable at last. I'm back in my green room, at the same spot where I used to write every day during my high school years. Everything just comes back and conveniently rests on the crevices of my mind (much like melted cheese, but meh, maybe I'm just hungry).  The thought of the oval, peaceful time at home, childish thoughts about love, fancy time with high school friends and sleepless nights! If it's any consolation (not), I know the last item isn't gone for good. Don't really know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Maybe, tonight, I'll just pretend to be a senior again, grappling with the idea of future and college. Maybe I could relive all those moments again, and bask in teenage dreams (no, I'm not referencing any song) and happy promises. There's no going back, I know, but I can pretend for sure. If only for a little while.